Was für eine Art D&B DJ seid Ihr??

[JVXP]

Ich find's (mal wieder) zum Schiessen!!!!

Geklaut von DOA und zusammengetragen!!!!

http://www.dogsonacid.com/showthread...0&pagenumber=1

which drum and bass dj are you?

• you're the techy filler dj. your favorite label is dsci4, 1210 recordings, and C4C recordings. this worse than a clownstep dj because a filler dj is very basic and has no character. you think if you play something techy people will think you're futuristic. you constantly trainwreck because you have only been a dj for several months and those ticks and beeps fuck you up.
  
• you're the clownstep dj. you hate music with a soul. your favorite lables include G2, gain, CIA, ram, Valve recordings, and joker. clownstep is your favorite because you grew up liking teeny bop bands, bubble gum pop, and contempary art. you think clownstep in "dancefloor" friendly but the truth is everyone on the floor is so fucked up they wouldn't know if the healiner was on.
  
• you're the edit/breaks dj. no ones ever heard of your favorite lables because they're so new and cutting edge! you think you're highly intelligent because you play tunes with crazy drumwork. your audience also thinks that you're intelligent and they're super coordinated because they can dance out of rhythm and pass it off as "polyrhythmic."
  
• you're the dubplate dj. a label? what's that? you hardly ever carry records but always have your CD book full of unreleased material. you don't care wether it's quality music or not because you know having dubs makes you elite. besides your friends would be uber pissed and highly insulted if you didn't rinse them. you also shit in your pants when your new white label bootleg comes in the mail.
  
• i'm a super elite badass producer. all my tracks were made by me and my friends (off of AIM) who write tracks too. I'm better than dubplate dj's because I use Final Scratch (cause I'm poor and can't afford acetate). All my tracks are awesome except the mastering job.
  
• you're the clownstep dj. you hate music with a soul. your favorite lables include Valve, True Playaz, CIA, Ram, Formation, and Full Cycle. clownstep is your favorite because you grew up liking happy hardcore, and copious ammounts of drugs. you think clownstep is "dancefloor" friendly but the truth is everyone on the floor is so fucked up they wouldn't know if the headliner was on and you LOVE MC's esp. Shabba.
  
• You're the liquid funk dj who only listens to Calibre, Nu:Tone, and Marcus Intelex. You think that drum n bass is dead and has no soul except this selected genre. You also cried when you saw Titanic and you wet the bed untill you were 14. Pastels are great on you.
  
• You're the dubby dj, anything with a subbass you think is reggae-influenced. You have never heard any real reggae or dub. youre smoking spliffs all day and you are growing dreads even if youre still bald! Any question you dont know the answer to is answered with "raaaassssssss bumpaclot!!!!" Digital and Spirit are your gods and if a tune has a delay longer than a few seconds you're buying it.
  
• You are the mixmaster dj. You got the same haircut as Andy C for 5 quid at the barber round the corner. You buy all the big tunes Andy plays in 3 fold. You have 15 technics decks at home and practice double and triple drops like Andy's all day. When playing live you trainwreck everything but your mates know you have the skills. You cut and chop, drop, wheel up, chop and cut again and none of it is making ANY sense. Any dj playing less than 35 tunes an hour is wack. One day you will be just as big as Andy is.
  
• youre the DRUM AND BASS dj... all your tunes have a fast [170+] breakbeat over a halftime bassline. you couldnt give a shite about labels because all of the ones you put your faith n went shit and started to release baron remixes etc. still, if you were forced to pick a favourite label you'd say bassbin, reinforced eastside or commercial suicide at a push. you realise the source of drum and bass' mythical strength is variety and rapid change of moods. so you buy everything from raiden to digital to calibre to fanu to klute to teebee to matrix to breakage and back because you know that depth and maturity comes from having a varied selection. you dont iunderstand how someone can only play one style ort limit themselves to one corner of the most versatile music there is.
  
• You are the "4/4 refugee" DJ..
  You started to DJ drum and bass around 2001 after the 4/4 clubs you used to love got ruined by 16 year old 'crasher kids and you got the fuck out. You never bought any dnb back then because you spent all your cash on d.a.v.e the drummer tunes. You buy records because the b-side is in f# @175bpm and u know u can key mix it with temple of doom and prozac. You mix clownstep like its techno, with little or no regard for purist attitudes. You are safe as fuck.
  
• you're a DOA freak who spends his days asking cute questions like: "today i've got more hair down there than i had yesterday. has that happened to you?".
  when your not chasing promos to make a new 'this months mixtape' you're thinking seriously about changing your screen name 'cos everyone else's is so much cooler. come to think of it, you're only here because the climate of army inspired homo-eroticism is so much safer than hanging out at the mall where pretty girls mercilessly take the piss. you're thinking they wouldn't be laughing if you played them 'the nine' - "proper-nasty" or "mad-sick" - depending on which side of the pond you decide you'll hail from today. you love the fact that everyone here thinks drum’ n’ bass/jungle should be owed by the americans and every hip-hop reference only confirms your suspicions. it doesn't worry you that all the big dawgs are middle-aged, hairy males with asthma - they're really good role-models for ghetto living you tell yourself. just so long as no-one says the dreaded "p" word; you'll be fine.
  
• You are the midwestern BFE elitist dick. You think Audio's "Jungle Demon" had the best label art cuz it looked all hard and evil and on fire and shit. You think Hive went soft with Bring it on. Any tune you did not purchase for your bag personally is weak ass pansy jungle. You prefer releases by Swedish producers who cannot be named for fear of breaking the spell which keeps them on this plane and live in caves. You have 20 sided dice in your record bag.
  
  
  
  
  
  
• 
  You Are "The Collector"
  
  You have spent a small fortune for the last 8 years amassing what most would call a truly vast, ranged, varied, sizable collection of Quality Wax since '96
  Making it all the more tragic and profound that you cant mix to save your eternal soul. On a good day you might be able to squeeze three or four tracks together without sounding like shoes in the dryer but on the most part your sets are like two kamikaze bullet trains heading straight for one another from your first drop.
  
• you're a liquid funk dj - you buy the latest soulful/jazzy dnb records and think that drum'n'bass is the most hip new music on the block. the only jungle you've ever witnessed is when you partied to house music in the brazilian riviera. your parents own every kenny g record there is. you think that you have every single girl in your pants while playing your set and go home disappointed when they have their last drink, say "thank you" for a good time and wave goodbye
  
• you're an atmospheric dj - you're a super nice guy. you scored a 0 on an asshole test with a minimum score of 20. you go to arizona for vacation twice a year. your parents attended the woodstock twice. In 1969 and 1994. In 1994 they took you with them. swooshes and sweeps make you orgasm quicker than jessica alba. you consider anything with a bassline heavy metal. you blush when people say you're good looking.
  
• You are the "promosexual" / and or "donnabe"
  
  You carry with you to all gigs an automated vinyl cutter mount on your Technics hooked to a satellite wireless LAN. When tunes are complete, they are pressed to wax while on the incoming track B deck while a preprogrammed bot posts as you on DOA about your selection.
  
  Any white labels you have are unmarked and guarded by a team of ex Black Beret operatives. Train spotters are given access to a courtesy phone and the producer's number when they ask what the track name is.
  
  You are telepathically linked to the Redeye database. Tunes that have finished playing are fed into an industrial shredder marked "too old" or "that is just SOOO three records ago"

OK, nicht lustig!!!!

Original geschrieben von JVXP
OK, nicht lustig!!!!

Ja Von wem sind denn diese Definitionen?

Der Held is dann derjenige, der von allem ein bischen spielt oder wie is das zu verstehn? Oder gehts einfach nur darum allen DJ'S zu sagen wie scheiße sie eigentlich sind?!?

DOA is schon irgendwie seltsam, ne?

Kheops

[JVXP]

Sich nicht wie hier üblich immer TIERISCH ernst zu nehmen sondern sich selbst auch mal durch den Kakao ziehen!!!!!!! So ist die Devise!!!!

[polarity]

hahaha geil die definitionen passen ja wie die faust aufs auge
ham sich sicher wieder paar super ernste hart arbeitende "ihr ding machende" djs uffgeregt.

[Mercedes-Benski]

Das sind auf jeden die beiden coolsten Definitionen :LOL:

Original geschrieben von JVXP

[*]you're the edit/breaks dj. no ones ever heard of your favorite lables because they're so new and cutting edge! you think you're highly intelligent because you play tunes with crazy drumwork. your audience also thinks that you're intelligent and they're super coordinated because they can dance out of rhythm and pass it off as "polyrhythmic."

[*]You're the liquid funk dj who only listens to Calibre, Nu:Tone, and Marcus Intelex. You think that drum n bass is dead and has no soul except this selected genre. You also cried when you saw Titanic and you wet the bed untill you were 14. Pastels are great on you.




OK, nicht lustig!!!!

[FEINDSOUL]

goil!

[risoner]

Gar nichts von allem...
--->Einmal SCHRANZ immer(!) Schranz...

Was`n das`n für`n schwachsin??!...
--->Engländer

[Soulsurfer]

muahuahahaha.....

ich find´s geil!

und ich glaube, ich kann 99% der dj´s die ich kenne in eine dieser
kategorien einordnen.... echt jetzt. perfekt

[JVXP]

Ich hab noch die fehlenden 3 ergänzt!!!!

[Dischdl]

Original geschrieben von JVXP
you're the dubplate dj. a label? what's that? you hardly ever carry records but always have your CD book full of unreleased material. you don't care wether it's quality music or not because you know having dubs makes you elite. besides your friends would be uber pissed and highly insulted if you didn't rinse them. you also shit in your pants when your new white label bootleg comes in the mail.

hehe, so true!

[Kobra]

Kanns jemand übersetzen,dann ist auch
anstrengend beim lesen!

[flowpro]

Original geschrieben von risoner
Gar nichts von allem...
--->Einmal SCHRANZ immer(!) Schranz...

Was`n das`n für`n schwachsin??!...
--->Engländer

äh, Du bist im falschen Forum! www.schranzforum.de kann dir helfen :o)

[StrokeLess]

Original geschrieben von flowpro
äh, Du bist im falschen Forum! www.schranzforum.de kann dir helfen :o)

und jetzt habe ich mein forum gefunden wo ich mich nieder lassen kann

[hustlin l.]

Original geschrieben von Soulsurfer
muahuahahaha.....

ich find´s geil!

und ich glaube, ich kann 99% der dj´s die ich kenne in eine dieser
kategorien einordnen.... echt jetzt. perfekt

das hab ich mir eben auch so gedacht! Is echt krass!

[wahn]

haha...sehr geil

[martsman]

Original geschrieben von JVXP
.

You are the "promosexual" / and or "donnabe"

You carry with you to all gigs an automated vinyl cutter mount on your Technics hooked to a satellite wireless LAN. When tunes are complete, they are pressed to wax while on the incoming track B deck while a preprogrammed bot posts as you on DOA about your selection.

Any white labels you have are unmarked and guarded by a team of ex Black Beret operatives. Train spotters are given access to a courtesy phone and the producer's number when they ask what the track name is.

You are telepathically linked to the Redeye database. Tunes that have finished playing are fed into an industrial shredder marked "too old" or "that is just SOOO three records ago"

klasse!

[Puutzki]

Original geschrieben von JVXP
[*]you're the edit/breaks dj. no ones ever heard of your favorite lables because they're so new and cutting edge! you think you're highly intelligent because you play tunes with crazy drumwork. your audience also thinks that you're intelligent and they're super coordinated because they can dance out of rhythm and pass it off as "polyrhythmic."

[Lorcscyric]

Original geschrieben von JVXP
[*]you're an atmospheric dj - you're a super nice guy. you scored a 0 on an asshole test with a minimum score of 20. you go .......

you scored 100 on an asshole test over the maximum score

[soundsurfer]

Original geschrieben von Lorcscyric
you scored 100 on an asshole test over the maximum score

nanana, nu mal keine disserei hier.

[Josh B]

...oh gott, es gibt noch mehrere wie ich...!

[Royalty]

Zitat von DEMON

...oh gott, es gibt noch mehrere wie ich...!

da siehste mal

[geek]

Zitat von JVXP

[*]you're the clownstep dj. you hate music with a soul. your favorite lables include G2, gain, CIA, ram, Valve recordings, and joker. clownstep is your favorite because you grew up liking teeny bop bands, bubble gum pop, and contempary art. you think clownstep in "dancefloor" friendly but the truth is everyone on the floor is so fucked up they wouldn't know if the healiner was on.

was hat clownstep jetzt eigentlich mit moderner kunst zu tun??
ich bin schockiert wie genau das auf mich zutrifft obwohl ich clownstep dann doch eher ironisch seh und in letzter zeit nichts mehr davon kaufe. außer g2 und gain sachen

außerdem liebe ich dilly.

[Chris1202]

Zitat von geek

außer g2 und gain sachen

also g2 würde ich jetzt aber nicht als typisch clownstep bezeichnen.

dann z.B. schon eher infrared seit etwa 2 jahren

[JVXP]

Zitat von geek

ich bin schockiert wie genau das auf mich zutrifft

Jetzt wo Du's sagst!!!!!!

obwohl ich clownstep dann doch eher ironisch seh und in letzter zeit nichts mehr davon kaufe. außer g2 und gain sachen

außerdem liebe ich dilly.

Ich muss sagen, die Neueren Sachen fang mir an, wieder besser zu gefallen!!!! Ich warte immer noch auf den einen da mit den Drums....

Aber All the Things hatte echt so was Neptunesques!!!!! ;o]

[watakant]

Zitat von JVXP

Jetzt wo Du's sagst!!!!!!







Ich muss sagen, die Neueren Sachen fang mir an, wieder besser zu gefallen!!!! Ich warte immer noch auf den einen da mit den Drums....

Aber All the Things hatte echt so was Neptunesques!!!!! ;o]

G2 & Gain nix C-step...Datt war Ironie...
Halt englischer Humor

[Johnson 119]

essential !!!!! & LMFAO
sticky nominated

[n.e.Thing]

Hab echt gehofft das ich mich in keiner Kategorie wieder find.

Leider weit gefehlt.

Dammit da is ja echt alles vertreten.

[RYAN]

Bravo!!!